New Dad? Here’s How To Take The Load Off The Mother


In those early days of your baby’s life, it can feel like the guy is being sidelined somewhat. Naturally, the mothers spend more time with the baby, and they do things that men can’t naturally do, like breastfeed! But, it’s important for the dad to be there as much as they can, in an emotional sense, but also, we need to be there to take the load off when it all gets a bit too much. So, are there some things you can do to help?

Keep On Top Of The Housework

The kitchen will be an absolute garbage tip, so if there isn’t much you can do by way of helping out with the baby at the very start, at least do what you can to keep the dishes from piling high. It’s impossible to do everything in these early days as far as cleaning is concerned, but a cursory clean will help make things that little bit easier.

Be Nurturing

She isn’t going to feel like she’s doing a good job, and yes, hormones are a big reason for this, but if you’re not being nurturing and supporting enough, then it’s going to fuel the fire. Instead, be reassuring, and be positive. Remember, she’s been through such a hard time with the birth, that she hasn’t had a mental break, so a few kind words is always going to help.

Try To Create Happy Memories

She might feel so zombified that the simplest of tasks can feel like an arduous trial, so take it upon yourself to get as many pictures as possible, and create a lot of happy moments that you can both look back on years from now. Even something like a maternity photography session could help to crystallize this perfect moment, even if it doesn’t feel so perfect right now due to tiredness. The first few months or so are going to be a blur, which is why it’s so important for you to learn to cherish these moments, and if you struggle yourself, then try to create these moments so you can all benefit.

Be Ready To Drop Everything

Yes, you might have had it in your head that you were going to the gym, but if something happens, and she gets very upset, you need to be prepared to drop everything in order to be with her and your baby. You might want to spend as much time as possible with your baby and your partner in those first few months, but there could be a point where you feel that there’s not much you can do, so the temptation to go out rears its head. If you do decide to go out by yourself, be aware that this might not materialize. This means you have to be ready to swoop in and comfort the mother, or provide an extra helping hand, because the baby won’t sleep again.

It’s hard work, especially if you’re not one of those hands-on dads, but you need to be as supportive and helpful as possible. And so, by taking the load off whenever it’s feasible, this is going to help your partner and your baby, but make you feel like you’re doing something worthwhile too.

This post is a collaborative effort by St. Louis Dad.


My name is Richie and I am a 37 year old father of two, a daughter and son. I am married to a beautiful woman named Destiny. She is the foundation of our family, and without her, none of this would be possible. During the day I work as a network security administrator for a local school district. At night I can be found illustrating books, working on websites, or creating music, but more than likely though I am spending time with my kids.

2 thoughts to “New Dad? Here’s How To Take The Load Off The Mother”

  1. Helping with household stuff and being an emotional support is such a huge help – especially if she doesn’t have to ask. 🙂

  2. Great helpful information. It is great to read something from a Dad sharing this with his readers. The things that you have shared are very meaningful to Mom. Especially in those first few weeks. It can make such a difference in how her mother journey starts off. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Also thank you for being a wonderful influence for other fathers out there.

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