Well, it wasn’t actually today, but it was recently… So I get home from work and settle into my after work routine of taking over the kids and as we start playing with toys, getting a snack, and what not, my wife lays this question on me that left me completely taken aback.
She asked me if she could take a shower. I was shocked and dumbfounded, but most of all I was ashamed. Ashamed that the basic psychological needs that every human being requires, including my wife were being asked of me like she’s some orphan in a Charles Dickens story. I was embarrassed that my wife actually felt that she had to ask me if she could take a shower instead of just saying “Hey I’m gonna get in the shower”. I have never told her that she has to ask to take a shower. So I was just completely shocked at the situation. Once I gained my composure I said to her with the sincerest of eyes and the calmest of voice…
“You never have to ask me if you can take a shower, just tell me you are going to get cleaned up. There is absolutely no reason for you to have to ask permission. It is your right to be able to have this personal time. So, no matter what I am doing, just tell me and I will drop everything and take over the kids.”
“You never have to ask me if you can take a shower…”
And I meant it. I did not realize that my wife was so worried about interrupting what I am doing just so she can get cleaned up. Any husband that requires their wife to ask to watch the kids so she can get cleaned up is a bum in my opinion. I love my wife so much and I know how hard it can be watching the kids each and everyday. I understand that when she is at home by herself with the kids that she doesn’t always have the time to get in the shower. She relies on me to take over when I get home so she can do what she needs to do. I have no problem with doing my job as a parent so she can refresh.
Just like going to the bathroom, or eating a meal, a shower is a basic necessity and in my opinion should not require any sort permission. Sure, let me know what you plan on doing but never is it OK to have to ask for permission just to take a shower. We’re not running a boot camp over here and I would like to keep it that way.
What are some other basic needs that you feel every person deserves? Comment below!